Farewell

A Final Reflection

For the past month, I have struggled to write a final reflection of my time and experience in India. Time and time again, I have sat down with the intention of conveying what I have learned and how the experience will shape the next steps of my studies, career and life. Ladakh opened my eyes to a landscape, a lifestyle and a land of people I could never before even fathom. Rather than provide a reflection of what I have learned I will write how this experience has changed my views on how I perceive my own culture now since being back in the United States.

Leaving SECMOL was one of the most heartbreaking departures I had ever experienced. The night before leaving I gave a speech and thanked Kunzes and a few of the staff members with prayer scarves. I remember feeling all choked up inside and at the same time trying my best to hold it together in front of all of the students. All semester I did my best to find a healthy balance between the students and the teachers as the intern. I connected well with the teachers and with the students, however there were times where I felt I was on their level in terms of being completely new to the experience. As a result of feeling in between both the staff and the students, I immersed myself into the Ladakhi life and formed the most amazing relationships with the Ladakhis. I learned about their way of thinking and living in harmony with the environment and each other. Their hearts were full of pure compassion and care for everyone around the themselves which is what made me fall in complete love with Ladakh and the VIS program because it allowed high school students to become their own.

Laura, a German volunteer, said in her speech when leaving SECMOL, “Ladakh is closer to heaven, not because of its peaks that rise in close proximity to the above clouds, but because of the people who reside in these hidden valleys.” She spoke these words one month after we arrived and as I listened, I felt chills wondering how I connected I would feel at the end of our semester. During my final speech I quoted Laura’s words. The last few days in Delhi with VIS was important for us all to have a transition before going straight back to Vermont. Amy, the other teacher, left for a NOLS course so James and I were left to make plans for the 5 days we were in Delhi. The 45 minutes plane ride over the receding snow capped landscape of the Himalayas took us into a different world. In retrospect, we were flying over mountains that have literally blocked the rest of the world from Ladakh. The air was scorching with humid sizzling heat and the Tibetan colony we stayed at in Delhi only reconfirmed our love and connectivity we had for SECMOL. James and I spent those last few days lifting their spirits as they too created wonderful relationships with the Ladakhi students. Majnu Ka Tilla was the Tibetan colony we stayed at in Delhi and the differences between these Tibetans and the Tibetans in Ladakh were grand. The Tibetans here wore tight jeans, smoked cigarettes and I caught monks on facebook in the internet café. My stomach churned at the idea of this way of life being introduced to the people of Ladakh.

I have been back in the US for a month, living in Martha’s Vineyard where I work for the Audubon Society. Not a day has passed where I do not think about their kindness and their warmth. It’s difficult to be around people who have no idea about where I have been because Ladakh can’t be described in a single sitting. I also find it difficult to look around and see how comfortable and convenient our lives are knowing that on the other side of the earth, half the world is living in shackles. The poverty in Delhi has made me realize how issue of sustainability will never be solved if the people can’t feed or shelter their own children. I was torn while in Delhi knowing that our earth will not ever be able to give the 1.2 billion people living in poverty the lifestyle we have in the US. Our earth would simply not be able to sustain such lifestyles. Ever since I stepped off the plane I have been thinking of ways I could go back and help preserve their beautiful way of life.

I have seen changes in myself in terms of how I perceive life around me including what I do every day, the impact I have on the rest of the world and the kind of lifestyle I want to lead. It is too easy to stay in this bubble our society has created for us and hide away from the multitude of problems we have created for the rest of the world to solve on their own. My job as a field assistant in Martha’s Vineyard focuses on mainly monitoring one endangered coastal bird species. I find it difficult to accept the fact all the money that has gone into this program and to me has resulted in two fledged chicks. The amount of waste from the fencing, the enclosures and the hundreds of miles worth of oil used to get to the beaches consumes my thoughts every day. I think of how that money could completely save the entire snow leopard population in the Himalaya, how the emissions from my truck has an effect on the receding glaciers in Ladakh and how the Ladakhis would find use in every single bit fencing and wiring that we just throw back into the landfill. This kind of thinking is what has made me unable to completely enjoy the kind of lifestyle we have and has also made me decide I must work towards a lifestyle that will allow me to help change the way Americans think. I try to talk about what I have seen as much as I can and pass on the kindness and compassion I experienced everyday in India.
My appreciation for sanitation, education, the internet and essentials we consider necessary has skyrocketed. And my love for my friends, family and passing strangers has changed in the most positive way. I have gained teaching, mentoring and advising skills that I hope to continue this coming year by acting both as an RA and TA.

I will do everything that I can to continue learning about international issues in that part of the world whether it is the political or religious conflicts and return to fulfill a promise I made not only to the Ladakhis but to myself.